Progress…does ones head in!


My mother cracks me up sometimes.

I got a phone call from her last night and first off she was very cranky with me because she’d been trying to call and my phone was not hung up properly.
Then she launches into a tirade about how angry she is with the clubs that her and her partner go to. She’s always cranky with the clubs because she likes to go out “rock and roll” dancing and every time she turns around the dance floor is shrinking – so they have more room for poker machines, you see.
Or they have cut this band out or that band or reduced the amount of time bands play for.
She rang and complained the other day, she was telling me…

“We pay good money to be members of your club but if you’re going to cut down the time for bands playing then we just won’t be coming anymore!”
“I will tell them.” curtly said whoever was on the other end of the phone.
“Ma’am you’re being very aggressive.” he also said, apparently, which I found extremely funny.
My mother is all of 5 foot tall and all she wants to do is “rock and roll” dance, but she’s being “aggressive” by putting in a complaint?
Grow some testicles boy!

Anyway, so then she tells me of her latest torment….the new mobile phone she’s bought.
She’s like me, resisting technology. It’s her first real mobile phone and she hasn’t got a CLUE how it works.
She rang a few weeks ago trying to ask ME questions about it.
I have no idea. I don’t own a phone or USE a phone, despite my daughter donating her old one which has been sitting on the bench happily charging away for weeks now.
I just never remember to take it WITH me!

“The phone says….explore your phone!” says my mother.
“So I started pressing buttons and bang…there goes $30 worth of credit! I haven’t even made a phone call yet and it’s cost me $30 damn dollars!”
“I don’t know how you did that mum. ” (I’m laughing, but empathising at the same time.)
EXPLORE your phone it says! ” she huffs.
“Tracy it’s not for lack of trying! I’m trying to get with the times and learn all these new things but this is the second $30 it’s chewed and now I’ve locked it somehow and I can’t figure out how to UNlock it! I’m taking it back to the shop, again! ”

I’m just imagining the frustration of whoever she’s been talking to at the store where she bought the phone. People like THEM, just don’t understand people like US. The clueless…the absolute virgins to mobile phones.
They must want to run and hide when they see my mother marching in, phone in hand, all five foot of her looking very….”aggressive”.
It’s like learning your way around a computer for the first time. A different world, a different language!
I’d be like her…just press all the buttons and see what happens.

“I’ve put it on silent now anyway.” she says.
“I don’t want it to ring” (lol!)
“Then it wakes me up in the night , flashing…CHARGE ME, CHARGE ME!”
And then she tells me how she actually phoned Telstra, to complain about the messages they keep sending her on the phone.
I don’t know what these messages are…probably akin to spam in your email inbox, but for some reason it’s greatly disturbing my mother that they are “sending her messages”.
God…she’ll be wearing tin foil on her head soon.

“I don’t know WHAT I’ll do if I take it out with me and it starts vibrating!” she says.

Ohhhh lord.
You are a character mum.

I daren’t ask her if she wants to buy a computer so she can actually email all her family back in Africa. (Instead of getting me to send them messages.)
I think that would well and truly do her head in!

About Tracy Lundgren

I am a people watcher,life observer, nature lover, spiritual seeker loving this crazy wild ride that life is taking me on. I am still a blank piece of paper waiting to be filled and that is good.
This entry was posted in Family, Getting older, health and well being, Humour, I don't fit in, Life, Parents, society, Technology and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Progress…does ones head in!

  1. God luv her and that she wants to boogie the night away for starters and then keep up with getting a mobile. How funny that the phone is saying exlpore your phone – press buttons so that I can be charging you all the unknown hidden fees – nasty. I was in hysterics with this!
    God…she’ll be wearing tin foil on her head soon. “I don’t know WHAT I’ll do if I take it out with me and it starts vibrating!” she says.
    Maybe tell her just smile mum–just smile 🙂 xx

    • desertrose7 says:

      She got it to work, rang me and then was shouting down the phone….something about wearing earphones so she won’t get brain cancer. I nearly fell off my chair laughing.

  2. Ha ! All your family members are ‘characters’ Tracy ! (:

    What a trip your mother is. My mother herself is only a slight up grade with the mobile phones. All 5’2 of her; I feel bad for the people helping her in the store too.

  3. Your mother sounds like a great character.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s