She’d often wondered what it would feel like…the sensation, the sound, to stick a knife into somebody.
Really stick it in good.
Would it be like stabbing a watermelon?
Or more like a pumpkin? No, the skin would be too hard.
What about the bones….
Just how much resistance does flesh have anyway?
The trouble with melons is that they don’t have bones.
A knife is most often a woman’s choice of weapon. She wondered if most people knew that.
It’s more personal than a gun, and just as effective, if used appropriately.
Straight through the eye perhaps?
That is what she’d pondered last night as she stood above him, while he slept.
How could he just lie there…..sleeping like that!
It made her furious.
That he should sleep, could sleep, while she paced in her misery, her agony.
She’d even raised her hand, the knife glinting in the light from the streetlamp outside….raised it, poised, ready to strike.
It felt satisfying, somehow to do this. Make this gesture, pretend…
Her secret….HER secret, this time.
Something HE did not know, would never know.
That she had stood, at his bedside, with a kitchen knife raised above his head as he so ignorantly slept and had wondered what it would feel like to stick a knife into somebody, was immensely satisfying.
“You going out with Jill and the girls today?” he asked over the top of his newspaper at the breakfast table.
“Yes, it’s Thursday, we always have brunch Thursdays, you know that dear. I have errands to run this morning so I’m leaving early.”
“Good, good. Yes, I suppose it is Thursday again.”
His head disappeared once more behind the paper.
“You’re lucky you still have two good eyes left.” she said. It just came out.
“What? Eyes? Nothing wrong with my eyes….I can see perfectly well with these new glasses.” he mumbled absently.
“Don’t forget to fix that chair leg today. I don’t want you breaking your back if it goes….Oh and that big kitchen knife…I left it out for you to sharpen. It feels a bit blunt. Don’t forget will you…”
“The chair, and the knife…..got it. Have a nice day with your friends love. See you later. Oh…wait…what was it you wanted to talk about last night, sorry, I know I’ve been busy lately.”
“It’s ok.” she said.
“It can wait.”